I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
