So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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