just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
