If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
