What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize