May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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