My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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