He is such a slut. More and more my type.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
do herpes really smell.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Randomize
