Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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