i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
