their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
