Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
