Hey man sorry I got all grabby
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Randomize