what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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