dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I just want to make out with him forever
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
