Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
