who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
