Don't make out with my wife yet
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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