party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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