its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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