It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
tell your sister to shave her snatch
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
