She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize