youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize