thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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