you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
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My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
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I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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