He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
