I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
