Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize