I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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