Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
