Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
