So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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