Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Im part way to drunk.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Randomize
