she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
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