Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
