Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
