lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
