My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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