somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
