You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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