So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
a search helicopter?!
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
