Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Everything about him screamed your future.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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