He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
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