moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize