I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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