I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
