But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
