Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize