why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
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