You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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