Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
