His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
